N. is at a difficult point where she is trying to give up naps but really still needs them once in a while. Now that I am homeschooling A. and still getting the into the swing of things there, I haven't been as focused on the little sweetie. Well, I take that back...she wants what she wants and NOW. If you don't immediately jump up and do what she wants, she will either 1. do it herself, even if she shouldn't or 2. just flat out do something else she shouldn't. So, one way or another she does get attention! I played "my little pony" with her a bit today, did a lacing activity, played Pretty Princess and Candyland. We tried other activities but she changed her mind every five minutes about what she wanted to do. Even A. jumped in and told her "you can't keep doing that, you are wearing mom out!" In the words of my friend Debbie, she is like a ping pong ball! Seriously, I have never met such a high strung kid in all my life. She is not the "go with the flow" 3rd born, she is the "I'm the boss!" 3rd born. She is sooooo cute and sweet, but I feel badly because I am constantly frustrated with her.
I was already cranky by 2:55 when we all piled in the car to pick I. up from school, then went to the food store. I was NOT in a good frame of mind to grocery shop with kids. In the parking lot, A. was pushing the cart full of food and for some reason decided it was a good idea to speed up as he got close to our car...the cart went over the curb and he dinged a brand new infinity parked next to our old mini van. OH MAN. I was MAD. I pondered the idea of just leaving...but of course, I couldn't. I saw an older gentleman close by and asked him if this was his car and explained what happened...he looked very sympathetic but said "I guess you'll have to do the right thing and wait for the owner, or else you can leave a note". So, I left a note with our phone number and off we went. I guess by that time A. was feeling very badly about it all, and I wasn't helping in that department. We got home and about 15 minutes later, while the kids were bickering, telling me how cranky I was, etc. a lady called and said it was her car we dinged. I gave her a very wooden apology but it was clear she will be holding us responsible for fixing her car. She will be getting back to me with the amount. She did thank me for leaving a phone number and being honest.
Did I mention we owe the IRS quite a bit, and the dentist who fixed N.'s teeth found another $150 to charge us?
In the evening, I took the girls to the church for Little Stars. I was talking to a friend when N. grabbed my keys faster than I could even compute what she was doing and proceeded to run to the electrical outlet on the wall. I screamed and stopped her just as she was about to electrocute herself. I am sooooo grateful that she wasn't hurt, but I was pretty shaken up.
When we got home I was pretty much DONE. Hubby impressed upon N. that she needs to L-I-S-T-E-N to me better. She tearfully came and apologized to me, then proceeded to bounce off the walls and do her own thing again.
So what am I learning in all of this (by no means have I already learned all there is here)?
1. I need to cut myself some slack. It is OK to put a high strung kid in front of the TV so I can have some sanity. I don't care what the experts and self-righteous uber-moms say. I love my kids, they've got me at home with them, we do alot, and I am not neglecting them if during certain phases of life they have more screen time than they ideally should!
2. I need to continue to run to my Father in heaven throughout the day. When I mess up I need to admit it and tell him "I don't want to be this way, please help". There is nothing more I can do to change myself. I need to let him do it. Then I need to move on and not get bogged down in guilt. He really does understand when the things going on around me are just more than I can handle.
3. Only He is able to keep us truly safe.
4. He is our provider, and no matter what I calculate or think we can fall back on, there is no substitute for how He takes care of us. Circumstances come in and rob us, but he always replenishes -- one way or another.
5. Never let fear keep you from being honest.
6. I need more sleep.
On that note, Good night!
"His mercies are new every morning..."
1 comment:
You're doing such a great job- even when it doesn't feel like it. :) Hugs to you.
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